Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Randomize
