did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
