How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
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