So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
