Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
