Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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