Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
