whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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