yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
