Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Buhtt sex?
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
