Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Randomize
