I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
