I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
