I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
