My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
We left the knife in your bed.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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