just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
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