Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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