How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
