This girl is more easily done than said...
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
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Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
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He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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