i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Why is your signature on my underwear?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
