Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
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