I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
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Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
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'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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