You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Randomize
