The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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