I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
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He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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