Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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