oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Randomize
