we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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