Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
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