I wish I could punch you in the face.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Randomize
