he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
