Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize