No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
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Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
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Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?