Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize