How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Let's paint friendship bongs
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize
