Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
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