god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
