i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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