That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
What a dumb baby whore.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Randomize
