Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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