i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
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