im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize
