I think my fart just growled at me.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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