Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
