Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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