What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
