just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
You know, be my cock's hype man.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
