do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
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