Do vagina's smell?
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Randomize