The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit